the yet-to-be-decided project: tony

So, I am having trouble deciding upon a theme (I can't seem to get my mind straight), and seeing as only one person really responded, I'm assuming you don't care either. So I'm taking pictures of people I like. Because I want to. And you're just going to have to deal with it.

eyebrow project: chris

Okay, so I'm stoked to finally able to start on my new summer portrait project. I was talking to Rob about my fascination (read:obsession) with eyebrows, especially when the person looks down and you really get to see their brow bone. I was told it was weird, so I'm taking it to the next level by doing a whole project on them. I found a article about Chinese feng shui and the human face, and how eyebrows are the single most defining thing that can outwardly describe our character. It's actually pretty interesting, because they go on to say that the shape/number of hairs in our eyebrows can show out strength of character to others. Ever since, I can only notice people's eyebrows, and I'm so excited to finally be able to start the project. I miss being creative. I really do.

Tonight I had a little test run (a rough draft, if you will) with Chris. First off, can I say how happy I am to have met this kid on the bus? Decmeber 26th, I'll never forget you. Secondly, I'm still a little lost on the aesthetics of the project, so I was hoping all of you could help me out. Consider this a makeshift critique, because I know we art kids miss them so much. And for you non-art majors, you'll love it. You know how I kind of hypothetically ask questions on this blog and no one answers? Seriously. Answer me. I really do value any input that you might have, because I have a lot of great eyebrowed individuals lined up, and I want to make sure this project works.

I was thinking about asking my subjects a question, and their answer could go along with their photo. Something about their own thoughts about their characteristics, because the more I think about it, the more I truly believe that our eyebrows can describe us. I'm also a little lost on some of the visuals. Do you like the color? Should it go into b&w? Should I zoom in closer? Remember, this is only a single photo and I intend on showing them all together so they really work well as a cohesive project. I was also going to do them all kind of the same, as in, all horizontals, kind of the same placement, and all with my 50mm (it makes everything so dreamy, plus it makes the backgrounds blurry, so it'll be more cohesive in the end).

Thoughts?

lone wolf pack

My, oh my, how things can change in a week. I'm trying to decide if my last post was a complaint, or expressing pure joy. I can't decide. I guess I will learn soon, because I quit my job at JHO.

I've been wanting to quit since day 1 really, but it just never happened. I worked tirelessly for months at little pay because I loved the people there. But some are starting to drift away or have changed venues, and I feel like I barely see them anymore. Plus, I had an encounter with a lovely gentleman the other day who was outright offended when he thought I ignored him (I'm sorry, I didn't hear you bro) and felt the need to complain about this very loudly to everybody around him. And my company so lovingly bought a fleet of iPads for really, no purpose what so ever, when they could have used that money for a better cause (like paying their employees?). Oh, and they were training me for a new position, that would have still been only $9 an hour, and I would have a shit-ton of new responsibilities. Add in the fact that my time off request (one Saturday) was denied, despite the fact that there are 350 employees. Not one of them could cover my shift? Really? So, even without another job lined up, I quit.

Now, I could have made that the meanest e-mail of my life, complaining endlessly about how the company treats it's employees like shit (they do) and how I never even wanted to think about this job ever again. But I didn't. I made it very nice and professional, and brought up the fact that it was fun (sometimes) and I met a great group of people (which is completely true). I was tearing up by the end of it, because I don't like to quit things. It feels like I'm giving up on myself, or I hadn't tried hard enough. The only other thing I have ever quit in my life was piano lessons when I was 15, and I bawled my eyes out during the process. So, having to quit a job that has been supporting my living was difficult, even if I only spent four months there.

So I send this e-mail in the morning. No response for hours. I decided that maybe he was just on vacation, so I e-mailed another person letting them know. No response. I get my schedule for next week. Six hours. They scheduled me for six hours. I had said that I was putting in my two weeks notice, and really, I don't mind working for two weeks. But they decide to just give me shit hours. Knowing how passive agressive they are to their employees (I've gotten the treatment before) and have an inablility to act like adults, I knew my decision to quit was right. I am a bit worried about the money front, but I still have Wolf Camera to fall back on for the time being. Speaking of which, we all went out last night and had a wonderful time. I'm glad I had them so I didn't have to worry a bit about my other company for at least one night.

Okay, venting session complete. Bring it on, life. I'm ready.

what's it like...

As my overcrowded bus drove past the farmer's market in Lincoln Park today, I began to think about all of those people who were enjoying themselves there. They have normal jobs, and have weekends on a regular basis (two days off in a row?). I've worked too long in the customer service industry to know what this is like. What's it like, to enjoy a Saturday? What's it like, to not have to eat your lunch alone in a backroom? What's it like, having a nice office decor, instead of hundreds of silly pictures? What's it like to only have a few co-workers, and not hundreds? What's it like, to wear whatever you want to work, and not some polo shirt that I'm pretty sure isn't even made out of real material?

I took my sweet time getting back up to the 94th floor from capture today, and decided to wait for the next ride up. As Bill closed the doors on an elevator full of sweaty tourists and their crying babies, he just turned to me and mumbled, "It's time for a big boy job". I merely nodded my head to concur, and in that moment I had completely forgotten that I am 24 years old, and I have yet to act my age. I feel obligated to go out and start a career and have a good job that I can actually tell people about, but honestly, I have no idea what that's like either. I might miss the times where I make a complete ass out of myself, because what else are you going to do in a job like this? I might miss the literally thousands of people from all over the world I talk to on a daily basis. I might miss looking down on the seemingly tiny sailboats afloat in Lake Michigan. I might miss those rainy days spent turning ourselves into muppets. I bet those people at the farmer's market have no idea what that's like.

oak street beach

My funk seems to be in full swing still, but Seth (the only person who knows about my less than stellar mood) managed to get me out of my apartment for some volleyball down on the beach. It was my first summer visit to the lake, and I should probably take advantage of it some more, because I have no idea where I'll be next year, and I might not be by the water anymore. As you can see, the JHO haunted our game from behind, but we did manage to get a giant "We <3 CM!" (CM being Claire Muller, who we knew was working). We called up and of course Claire was on break, but we wanted to know if they could see our message. We told Dan to walk over to the window and he said, "That Claire is so lucky", so obvs we could make a career in sandwriting.

But my funk (or my dark passenger as I like to call it now [Yayyy Dexter]) kind of took over, so I'm finding it hard to get my tasks done for the one day off I get a week. I need to haul my ass up to the Trader Joe's (I refuse to shop anywhere else now, unless I need to get Tostitos and/or Pepsi, the two things I can't live without), get my (now sandy) laundry done, clean this place up, and possibly be productive. But first I'm going to watch 16 and Pregnant.

funk

I can't seem to sit on the couch like a normal person.
I can't seem to shake this feeling of being lonely, but not wanting to go out.
I can't stop listening to Laura Marling.
I can't stop thinking about folklore and seafaring tattoos.
I can't seem to find a better use of my time.
I can't bring myself to replace the pillow I've had for 14 years, even though it's falling apart.
I can't make the ache in my knee go away.
I can't stop worrying about money and not getting days off so I can go home.
I can't help but feel like I'm in an episode of Glee.

Merr, I want this to go away.

the adventures of my feet

So, long story short, I went out to Geneva today, and I got kind of drunk. I checked my camera on the train ride home, and of the pictures were of my feet. I guess that's what happens after four glasses of generously poured wine (and havin' some sweet ass Toms!). The dog isn't mine, it's Kristin's (although we do have a new edition to the Samuell clan... Sandy!). I even got to ride in a car without paying a ridiculous fare, ate some food, hung out with cool middle-aged friends, and damn near fell asleep on the train (with Mum&Sons in my lap, no less! This is the last you'll hear about them, I swear... [although I can't make any promises]). Sometimes I really like this place.

stl

Ahh, vacation.

The main purpose for our trip to St. Louis was for some Mumford & Sons action, but I'm glad that we decided to make a weekend out of it. I have recently grown weary of the gray compounds of this city and the escape to something a little more quiet was much needed. St. Louis is a gorgeous town with a lot of character and history, and green space, which Chicago is severely lacking. I don't regret my move here at all; in fact, I think it was the best decision I could have made. I've really grown into a different person (in a good way), but my itchy feet have me begging to move on to a new chapter. I'll have to stick it out until next April, but I will surely enjoy the rest of my time here. In the mean time, I'll plan my next move, and St. Louis might be a strong contender.

Anyway, I had such a lovely time, and it even became a real road trip when we drove on Route 66 (okay, for like, 50 seconds, but still), and developed our own little game involving white trucks and yellow cars. I would try to explain, but Rob and I have such a mutual understanding of each other, that I just don't think anyone else would get it. Thanks for a good time, pal.


Annnnd okay, one more for the road! You don't have to watch the whole thing, but please watch starting at 1:40. That banjo melts my heart every time.

I told Andy that I would be talking about this concert for months, so I thought I would try and get as much out of my system as possible. Again, it's hard for me to put in words how much this band has meant to me without sounding like a complete nut-job (I am a little, but I'm not nearly as crazy as you think). I know this is a crappy little video, and I am certainly no videographer, but I'm happy to call this clip my own. From Marcus' dancing around like a fool with a broken string (can you count how many time he spins in a circle?), to Ben's constant smiling while playing (adorbs), to Ted picking up his bass (he must have some hella muscles), and to my dear Winston for rocking out that hard on a banjo, it's easy to see how much love and passion they have for their own art, and it's hard for me to not love them for it. Music often speaks for our emotions and aspirations, and I'm glad that I finally found this band to convey just a small part of me.

Also, if you had told me two years ago that my future crush would air hump his own banjo, have a disgusting beard/all around look like a homeless person with a rattail, I would have called you crazy. But here I am, swooning over a boy named Winnie.

sigh no more

Words will never be able to describe how in love I am with these boys.

a talking picture

Okay, I wouldn't get too used to this, but I made a promise. And don't worry, I'm signing up for lessons tomorrow. Also, with my picks on, I couldn't press the stop button, so you might hear a "Okay, stop!" at the end, thinking that if I said stop, it would just stop recording. I think I'll stay with still pictures from now on.