six hours spent at the sky deck ledge

Okay, it's not often you can say you worked in a little glass box that dangles 1,400+ feet in the air. It's true. I'll admit, it's fun up there, until you meet the thousands of people who visit on a daily basis. And then you realize, they're all dumb. Dumb. As. Shit.

I'm sure most have you saw my recent Facebook post:

So I worked at the top of the Sears Tower today, my number one question: "Where is Lake Michigan?" My inner monologue screamed back, "Are you fucking blind? That blue stuff, that's Lake Michigan."

And that's not even half of the shit I hear up there.

Example: While over-looking the Sox stadium (which at 1,400 feet about the ground, you can tell is a baseball stadium) Dude: "What's going on there? Baseball, maybe?"

Example: "So, the lake is primarily to the East?" Primarily? Try, 'the lake is to the East', dude. He then later asked, "Is there an East Chicago?" to which I replied, "The lake."

Example:
Guy: So, what's the visibility like on a good day?
Me: I'm not sure mile-wise, but you can see four states on a clear day.
Guy: Really? Which ones?
Me: Indiana, Illinois, Michigan, Wis-
Guy: Ohio?
Me: No, Wis-
Guy: Iowa?
Me (in my head): Stop guessing! Christ!

Example: Lady: "Why is there white stuff in my photo? Can you make that go away?" The white stuff she was alluding to was a cloud, and no ma'am, I cannot make that go away.

Example: I'm going to tell you all right now, Chicago only has the one lake. Sorry to break it to you.

Example: While explaining how the ledge boxes actually retract back into the building so the automatic window cleaning machine can wash them, I am immediately asked, "And how do they clean the rest of the windows?"

Example: We most obviously have a sign that reads, "Take your picture for free, then see if you'd like to buy the prints. Please do not ask me the prices, I am just the photographer! Thank you!"
Everybody I talked to yesterday: "How much are the photos?"

And I'm not sure why everyone wants to see the airport so fucking badly, but it's to the west. PLEASE STOP ASKING ME THIS.

Lord, beer me strength.